True Romance

I’ve long ago admitted to being a romantic. Not a hopeless romantic but a romantic nonetheless.

I puke at the mushy, mushy stuff that bear no resemblance to how love develops in real life. Yes, I do believe in love at first sight, or great attraction, but I’m more convinced if love survives life’s tolls and grow into something more solid than the initial reaction.

Over this Easter holiday, I happened upon a story about that 1990s hit, la Femme Nikita...okay, okay, I didn’t happen on it, I went in search of it. I was trying to work out some romantic scenes in Vampire Dawn and something about Michael and Nikita kept nagging at me. I felt the need to see what interaction between the two characters were like in order to decide how my characters would play against each other. (Plus after watching one episode, I find the new Nikita show a failed cliché.)

Before I get back to Michael and Nikita, let me start off by saying that there are very few romantic novels, movies or television shows that I enjoy. Primarily my interest is more dramatic with a bit of action or problem-solving intellect. I like mysteries and crime novels (with or without romance), first person narrative if the narrator is interesting and of, course anything by Stephen King. I never read a romance novel until I was in my 20s.

My list of romantic moments, written or dramatized are:

First a disclaimer: this list is as I can remember right now. It doesn’t mean that there have not been others or that sometime in the near future the list will not change. So here goes:

I think my most favourite movie is The Bridges of Madison County with Clint Eastwood and Meryl Streep. It’s the most sensual movie I have ever seen and starring old people at that!

My other favourites, in no particular order are:

-The English Patient – Ralph Fiennes and Juliet Binoche.
-Sixteen Candles - Molly Ringwald and Justin Henry.
-Bend it like Beckham – Parminder Nagra, Keira Knightely and Jonathan Rhys Myers.
-The Princess Bride – Cary Elwes and Robin Wright.
-The Way We Were – Barbara Streisand and Robert Redford.
-The Horse Whisperer – Robert Redford and Kristin Scott Thomas.
-The Wedding Planner – Jennifer Lopez and Matthew McConaughey.
-Something New – Sanaa Lathan and Simon Baker.
-Angel Eyes – Jennifer Lopez and James Caveizel.
-Mission Impossible II – Tom Cruise and Thandie Newton.
-The Truth about Charlie – Thandie Newton and Mark Wahlberg.
-Anything adapted from Nicholas Sparks pre Nights in Rodantha, such as Message in a Bottle, A Walk to Remember and The Notebook. Anything now is just mush.
-Ten Things I Hate About You – Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles.
-And last but not least – and for this I will get a lot of flack – Brokeback Mountain with Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal as well as A Single Man with Colin Firth. Yeah, say it and get it over with. I don’t care. I like them because of the writing and the plot and the fact that they are beautifully scripted and expertly directed.

I won’t get into books now but for television series the list is rather short and more consists of missteps than anything else. All the romantic characters in television drama that could have great onscreen relationships usually fizzle and die and I stop watching. JAG immediately comes to mind. There was an opportunity there, much like there is now for Tony and Ziva in the NCIS drama. Bones too is another let down and one I’ve stopped watching.

Producers seem to get cold feet as they think the end of any series is the consummation of the romance, but that isn’t so. The romance actually begins after and that’s the beauty of it. It takes a skilled and brave studio to carry on a series after the characters have gotten together and it is felt that nothing else can happen. I consider the producers spineless and lacking creativity and so they go for the obvious – never make the characters come together, for what will we then write? My response, go find some experienced writers and begin the real relationship.

That takes me back to la Femme Nikita and the never-ending romance of Michael and Nikita and my week of indulgence. This is a show that is a perfect example of how to manage a romance and manage it well.

First there was the question of, Will they get together and does he even like her? Once that was answered in his mumbled-lack-for-words-breathless whispers, we then start thinking, If they do, what will happen? We saw that and finally came the ultimate question, Will they survive and will their love last considering they work for an agency that frowns upon imperfection and considers emotional attachment, debilitating. Their solution should this occur is death. For Michael and Nikita, it was truly a live or die situation and as we saw from many episodes, both characters were more than willing to die for each other or at the very least preserve the other. Of course they both will survive. But despite this, it is perhaps the ending that’s most fulfilling and that left something for the current Nikita producers to take off on. But they failed to do so.

In the end Michael and Nikita still aren’t together; at least not how normal people consider together. At the time of parting their love is evident but duty separates them and they have little choice but to wait. It is the tragedy of their situation that makes their love true.

To understand the obligations of your partner, support it and still love is probably one of the best ways modern couples can show their love. It is why the old fashion notion of the woman taking care of the house and the children while the man works is not so ridiculous if you truly think about it. If love can endure poverty or death or similar grief, then you are set for life. Nothing will break you apart. This is unselfish behaviour and the only way of demonstrating true love.

Someone I went out with once said, you should marry someone who is in love with you. It took me a while to reason this out, but he was right. If we all married people who are in love with us, then for sure we will both love each other. Get it?

This is what the characters in la Femme Nikita portrayed: they were with people they knew loved them. It took Michael a long time to tell Nikita he loved her but he showed it everyday. His lack of expression was a puzzle, for like a typical woman, Nikita held nothing back and was quite happy to tell him countless times that she loved him. But his one wish was for her to be patient. A request for patience in this situation is one that required great faith and belief to know that he had his reasons. I don’t know anyone in real life who would do this.

Mid-way through the series, the reason for Michael’s hesitation was revealed and that sent viewers into a new tizzy. I’m sure he was hated by many but there were a few, including me, who perfectly understood and who knew the characters would get through it because, to say it as simply as it can be said, they had trust and respect for each other, another sign of true love. In one episode when Nikita was rethinking her faith in Michael, he says, ‘You are the one person in the entire world I can trust. Don’t fail me’. In the final episode near the very end, he embraces her and says, ‘I love you’.

So, is the love between the characters of Michael and Nikita the perfect love story? I think so. It’s the best I’ve seen portrayed on any screen, even more than those I’ve listed above. Yeah, yeah. I know you’re asking what about Romeo and Juliet or even Swazy and Moore in Ghost? Michael and Nikita are far better.

Romeo and Juliet died. What kind of crop out is that? Yes, I understand that they can’t live without each other, but to me, living with the hope that one day they would be together would be better. Fake suicide should not have come into it at all. But Shakespeare had little choice if he wanted to portray the tragedy of the day. After all Romeo and Juliet is a sort of ‘literary cautionary tale’ meant to warn that you never know what plots are playing in the background while you fight your battles, which often are unnecessary.

One last thing about Michael and Nikita. Roy Dupuis was not necessarily a good looking actor – unless viewed in a certain light – but he was quite sensual. I won’t say sexy because back then I was never sure about those tight leather pants and looking at them again, I’m thinking, creepy. His mouth’s sort of small and he appears shorter than the 6’ 11” he was supposed to be.

What he had going for him were those eyes and the way he played a romance scene. His ability to maintain and hold eye contact was uncanny – it may be a camera trick, but who cared. And he had a way of angling his head as if to search the deeper meaning.

The character Michael was able to exude desire simply by touching Nikita’s hands. He would lace his through hers and examined their entwined fingers as if he was always amazed that she let him touch her. And whenever he spoke to her in private he was always touching: arm, shoulder, hairline, brown, lips. His movements were seamless and natural and there was no resistance she could offer and often simply melted at his touch.

An aside—the actress who played Nikita was Peta Wilson. She’s not much known as Roy Dupuis except for their native homes. It is my opinion that Peta Wilson is a good actor and I wonder what would have happened if she lived in Hollywood and picked up regular roles there. In la Femme Nikita, her ability to switch emotions while the camera remained fixed on her face was uncanny. She could go from smiling to sad and hurt in a second and it all showed on her face: lips, eyes, angling of the head. Her on film crying is one of the best I’ve seen. Not the bawling or the scrunching of the face, but the fact that her eyes do tear up and around them reddens; or when Michael says something sexy and she blushes, her skin actually flushes. Her emotions were real. She was a clunky girl but then again that was probably the character. Another endearing factor – she was not a size 2.

I don’t know if the characters were created purposely to be as they were or if the writers stumbled on something and decided to go with it. What I have read is that they had very little budget to work with and it required great creativity to come up with something the audience would enjoy. That compares to nowadays actors whose salaries seem to know no boundaries. I think some of the pay is quite ridiculous and when their pays are high, the acting suffers. They feel they are important and people will come to see regardless, so why put out the effort.

For the writers or the director of la Femme Nikita, I like that the sex was never the focus and that there was no direct humping scenes. I like too that it’s Michael who mostly makes the arrangements for them to meet and that the character felt it his duty to provide a safe place and prepare. All she had to do was turn up. That caveman feature will get us girls every time.

If you look at my list above you will see that none of these shows have these sweaty, hot sexy scenes or characters that were constantly jumping in bed. In la Femme Nikiki most of the interactions were foreplay, focusing on the face and shoulders and maybe a back here and there. However, there was one scene where Michael was standing naked by a window and Nikita, also naked joined him. The shot lasted less than 5 seconds and them focused on their faces for the remainder. In other words, it was tastefully done. We are all adults, we can imagine what goes on between two people when they get naked, do we really need to see...all the time? And as is common in these nowadays sitcoms, do they really have to talk about sex in all their episodes, every single one?

I never got into Friends or Grey’s Anatomy or shows like that because everyone sleeps with everyone. When is there time to have great interaction? I’ve never watched it long enough to find out if there’s any. That brings Nurse Hawthorne to mind...I wonder what they’ll come up with this season?

So, in the end, what do I have to say for myself?

I am weird when it comes to love and all that and I believe that the bible had it right. The vows as presented did dictate that if two persons chose to marry, then they better be in love for nothing else will get them past the better or worst phases or even through the years of grief after death. I look differently on people who seek to change the vows. I’m always wondering what are they up to? If you love this person, then why is it so hard to say that at this moment, I will give you my all, I will love and honor you and I will obey. We both are agreeing to the same thing, so what’s so wrong with that? After all, isn’t love supposed to triumph all?

Easter Reviewed

My friend is all over Easter. She's into the Easter bunny, the hunt, the eggs -- the whole thing. And she's most surprised that I never exposed my daughter to that furry little rabbit that is non-existent in Jamaica except for a stew, or a cage. Why on earth would I have spun some tale about a rabbit that brings eggs? I can't even remember if that's how it goes...or if he brings chocolates. Whatever!

I was raised Christian and I went to a catholic high school. Need I say more? There is no Easter bunny in the stations of the cross and there's no disillusion that this is a time of hunting eggs. The only hunting involved soul searching and forgiveness seeking. Reflection was a big part of Easter and so too repentance.

Many feel it is their duty to give up some sin or pleasure for Lent and that through this, their atonement secures them a place in heaven. I am of the firm view that if you believe in Lent, the Bible, Jesus, etc., then you should know that abstinence for a few weeks will not resolve the issue. There's no two ways about Christianity. You either believe or you don't. And once you do, there's that little book called the Bible. You can't follow one section and then ignore everything else that doesn't fit with your lifestyle. If there's sin to be repented and pleasures to be put aside, then this must be done for all your life, not just during Lent. No one said righteousness was easy. Ask the nuns.

More and more we see the true meaning of Easter give way to shameless commercialization that encourages Easter egg hunts and the purchase of copious amounts of spring-colored sweets. I think the bunny's creepy. In the first place, where does he put the eggs? After seeing the preview to Hop, that ridiculous movie that's clearly meant for 3-year olds, I'm afraid to touch the stuff unless it's from a certified factory like Cadbury's. And if that's my thinking, what's the purpose of the bunny? Not a thing. Stew anyone?

But despite all of this, Easter is a time for reflection, just like Christmas. These holidays forces me to think of my life, even for a moment. It's a time to analyze the good and the bad and to determine: Am I getting it right? What will happen to my soul when I'm departed? It's a question I'm far too scared to answer, just because I know.

I don't subscribe to the premise that everyone who has some good in them goes to heaven. That's too easy. But seriously, where do the 'in-betweens' go? The ones who are bad but not quite as bad as the man who just shot his girlfriend because she left him? If they did not follow the Word, would they end up in hell together? It almost seems unfair. And when she sees him there, what will she say? There must be different levels, don't you think? But I fear good reader that the answer may not be what we want?

I reflect on Thee, oh Lord and accept what may.

The original wireless message

Last week I was driving to work and saw a billboard that read:

Prayer, the original wireless message - 0$.

I thought brilliant! because it was funny and then had to sober up because it was quite serious. Coincidentally, I had just read a page in the Daily Word (yes, I do read it. My sister keeps me supplied so I must read.) that spoke about prayer in times of desperation and the faith to know that God will answer. Those two things happening so close together made me wonder about the many times that I have called on God for help, knowing it's just because I can't figure my way out of the latest pickle. But what do I do the other times when things are good? Nothing.

Sometimes I do say thanks like when my daughter drives in late at night and I know she's safe, but mostly I forget to say thanks for the good things that happen every day.

So, from now on, I'm going to take a minute and pause to say thanks.

This week I uploaded an ebook on Smashwords.com and sold a copy. I also sold 5 copies of other stories on Kindle this month and am at a total of 37 from last June; this without advertising and only telling 2 people. Thank you God.

My family is well and I am working and getting paid, for this I am especially grateful.

Take a break and pause a moment and think about the blessings in your life. Even if you don't believe in God, you must admit, something is keeping us all going and for that, you should be grateful.

I am blessed.

Writing to the death!

I just watched an interview with famous author Dean Koontz who has sold over 4 million books worldwide. He was really being interviewed about his love for his dog but of course, some things about writing came out.

Koontz writes on a 19 year old computer that doesn't even have Email. I can understand this because the temptation to check an email is quite high especially is the email remains open like mine and arrivals are announced with a little tone. What I don't get though is him writing his emails for an assistant to type and send off. Huh? Oh well, if you're as rich as he is, then you can have an assistant do everything for you, even breath. His saving grace however is that he types at lightening speed. Two fingers flying over the clunky keyboard as if he was a tap dancer on a mission for a world record.

Koontz gave a tour of his library which he separated into books that he reads and his books. Both are large, but his books are closed off by an elaborate grill gate that opens to rows and rows of novels with his name on it including those translated into copious different languages -- more than I knew existed.

Koontz is 60 but he has been writing for years and he said he'll be writing until he drops dead at the keyboard -- it's what writers do. He also said that creativity is a muscle in the brain that must be worked and that the more one imagines, the easir it is to produce new stories...or something like that.

I agree as it seems that I'll be writing forever, whether I'm published or not. When I'm gray (well, more gray) and old, I'll sit in a comfortable chair and read my stories and imagine what could.

Here's to writing to the end.

Vampire Dawn - a little revealed.

I'm working on my novel, VAMPIRE DAWN which is about a black vampire living in Portland, Jamaica at the time of slavery. If you're into vampires you can imagine what this would be like and see the varying roads the story could take. Think about a black man who is an undead but who is physically stronger than all the white masters put together. That's something, huh? Except, it's dangerous too. Imagine him being discovered and them hunting him? And what would they do to others they suspect of having the same powers? Would they start a manhunt? Probably. In which case, it's important for Neloc to remain undetected.

In VAMPIRE DAWN, Neloc was turned by a white man whom he consider his father, but at the same time blames for taking his life. For Neloc, Portland is quite boring. He has nothing to do at night but roam the forests and chase animals. Then one night, while he lazed on a branch and watched the stars, he sees a slave girl who has come to the watering hole to bathe. Her name is Camilla. He watches her play in the water and is quite taken. She is brave for being out at night when she could be caught and severely punished. But he sees her need for freedom and is compelled to follow, just to be sure she returns safely to whatever estate she came from.

While watching Camilla sneak into the compound, Neloc makes a sound which frightens her. She stumbles. Halton, the guard wakes and goes to investigate. He enters Camilla's hut and sees her still wet from the swim. He decides to take what he feels is his. He attacks Camilla. Neloc comes to her rescue and kills Halton in the process, sucking him dry. Camilla sees this and faints. Neloc must leave or be found out. He chooses to leave and must hurry to Benin, because he is not prepared for the effects of drinking human blood after almost half a century without. As he fights his new found thirst, he wakes to find Alphanso gone. Suddenly his life is complicated as he is torn between ensuring Camilla's safety and finding Alphanso, his creator and father and the man without whom he cannot live in a white man's world.

Imagine the consequences of his actions. How will Camilla explain a dead, bloodless white guard in her hut? What will the white masters do with her when they discover Halton's body?

I'm in the middle of the novel and working my way to the end which I've already written. It's exciting and sometimes I can't wait to add a few more pages. Other times I don't want to be near it because I feel I cannot do the story justice. That's when I become really scared that I won't finish and that I'll never find a publisher.

I first wrote about Neloc in 2001. Yes, in 2001. Believe it or not. I wrote about 4 paragraphs and left it. But it never quite left me. Like all my stories, they remain near and pull my thoughts on a daily basis. I'm constantly thinking about it and wondering what should come next. I remember those paragraphs like I'd just written them. Halton wasn't a guard but Camilla's lover and it wasn't slavery time but some years on when black men were said to be free. Halton was a jerk who slept around with anyone who spread their legs for him. Camilla was thoroughly in love with him and while she knew of his indiscretions, she refused to challenge him on it, thinking that if she showed her love more, he would eventually be with her alone.

The paragraphs pick-up with Camilla walking behind Halton, begging him not to go out. He turns and smacks her on the cheek and tells her to go home and stop following him. Up on a branch in a nearby tree, a black man is watching the scene. he can read both their minds. He dislikes the man's character and his heart pains for the woman because she is so true and when Halton strikes he decides he must teach him a lesson and swoops down on the man, breaking his neck and sucking his blood. Camilla freaks out and runs off. She wakes the village with her noise and the village Madda comes to take control. She puts Camilla to bed and administer till Camilla is calm and is able to tell them about the black man that floated. No one but the Madda believes. Neloc returns home to his estate and is angry for revealing himself and for allowing the woman to go. He should have taken her with him and he vows to go find her. He had to. I didn't write another word until 2006 and then not again until last year.

In VAMPIRE DAWN, Halton is the guard who attempts to rape Camilla and is killed by Neloc who is indeed a vampire. The Madda is Selma who is a blind priestess who can do wonders with her potions and magical spirits. Neloc does live at Benin and he eventually will take Camilla to his home. I've gone 275 pages and I hope I can finish.

The novel was first named Neloc Benin after the lead character. A few weeks ago I changed it to VAMPIRE DAWN because these words are important in the story. I want the story to be a trilogy that tracks Neloc and Camilla's adventures as they travel the world. I don't know how it'll go as yet, but I do know one of two ways the entire thing will end. Either someone will die, or someone will leave. I already know to which way I'm leaning but you'll have to wait on the published novel to find out.

I will continue to blog about VAMPIRE DAWN, my writing and other things. You should come with me on this exciting journey.